A Tale of Two Mamas
Trying to keep someone IN timeout
Archive for Baby Project 2
March 15, 2007 at 2:46 pm · Filed under Baby Project 2, Blogroll, Rants
So if you’ve been up with our website you’ve read about the saga with our insurance and probably heard me bitching about it at one point or another. Well, they’re at it again.
The last denial of infertility coverage stated that I had to do 3 injectible inseminations before I would be approved for Invitro. Well, now they are saying since I got pregnant for one of them I’m no longer infertile and it starts all over again. I have to go 12 months with being infertile and 11 more inseminations.
I’m seriously so pissed I could spit and I can’t stop crying. Right when I thought I saw light at the end of a very dark tunnel the door has been slammed shut again.
We’ve contacted our attorney and she’s going to draft a letter up on our behalf and we’re going to appeal. I just feel like no matter what I always get the shitty end of the deal.
Our fertility center called this morning to tell me that they can no longer spend any more time on the case because they’ve spent hours and hours and it’s getting no where. Gee, THANKS. We’ve only been with you for 4 years and $45,000.
My life sucks today. BLUE CROSS BLUE SHIELD OF MASS - Go to hell.
January 25, 2007 at 7:38 pm · Filed under Baby Project 2, Blogroll, PP
At this point in our infertility “adventure” I am just waiting to get my period and then we are going to do one last injectible artificial insemination using Graem’s donor’s sperm. We figure we have one last vial at the clinic and so we might as well use it up.
On day three of my cycle I will start Lupron injections nightly so that I don’t ovulate, Gonal-F and Repronex to activate my ovaries and follicles to produce eggs. (Hopefully, good quality too!). Then around day 13 or so of my cycle I will take an HCG shot and that will send all of the eggs out of the follicle and into my fallopian tubes. Where they will be fertilized and then hopefully implant.
I would love for this to work - but if it doesn’t my insurance would pay for Invitro Fertilization. At one point we were thinking of getting PGD which is the genetic testing but I’ve been told that since I’ve only had one miscarriage and I’m only 30 that it probably isn’t a genetic thing.
Check out the website for Dr. Randy Morris. They actually offer a free book “The Consumer’s Guide to Infertility and IVF”. Dr. Morris has many years of infertility medicine and it also looks like he might at times have studies where people can participate in a treatment for free or a reduced cost.
That’s actually what we did when we went to Las Vegas and worked with Dr. Sher.
This post sponsored by: http://www.ivf1.com
January 9, 2007 at 5:07 pm · Filed under Baby Project 2, Blogroll
Today I went to the Fertility Center to get checked out. I had to get an ultrasound and bloodwork to see how well my body was processing the miscarriage.
My HCG was 45.5 - down from 117 last Wednesday. My lining was still pretty thick though. I asked if I should get a D&C at this point and the nurse seems to think that either I’ll shed it or I’ll shed it with my next period.
She seems to think that I’ll get my period in about two weeks and we can start up our last and final IUI. She also mentioned that if my period doesn’t come that I might be able to start up Prometrium and that will get things going.
After the appointment we went with Dada to King David in Manlius and had delicious gyros and salad. It was really good and we had to have some chocolate baklava. Mmm..
I’ll have to schedule another appointment for next week and hopefully my levels will be back down to 0. Too bad they don’t go down as fast as they go up when you’re pregnant.
January 3, 2007 at 3:01 pm · Filed under Baby Project 2, Blogroll
It’s bizarre to think that this time last week we were looking at our baby on the ultrasound machine and being reassured that everything was going to be alright and no sign of stress or trauma.
Today, I went to the doctor and the Nurse Practitioner did an ultrasound. Of course, there’s nothing to be seen - except tons of lining. She said that I had passed about 1/2 of it but still had a lot to go. She offered a D&C but I just don’t want to go that route and feel that it would be better and more natural if I just let it pass by itself.
They also did bloodwork and my HCG had gone from like 15,000 back down to 117. So they are guessing that by next week my HCG will be zero again.
They also gave me a shot of Rhogam - this is because my bloodtype is A- and the donor’s is A+. Basically, if you get pregnant with +/- blood you can build up antibodies and have problems getting pregnant again. So that’s why I got the shot.
We also talked about starting up again and they said that we could start up with my next period. Basically, we’d do everything including the dosing and insemination the exact same.
I also called the sperm bank on the way back home and our donor has had 6 miscarriages. That seems like a lot. However, it could just be the different women using him. Also, maybe women that have had gyno problems or are older have been trying with him.
What’s bizarre is that if I took a pregnancy test it would still show up pregnant.
The whole way up to the fertility center I cried, and of course while I was there I cried, and even driving home I cried. It just won’t stop coming out. I feel so incredibly sad and what’s horrible is that I don’t know how to feel better.
Margot’s been amazing and so supportive but I know she’s hurting now too and just wants to help me.
I just wish there was a light at the end of the tunnel. A guarantee that in the next year or two I would have a baby in my arms.
January 3, 2007 at 7:15 am · Filed under Baby Project 2
Yesterday was my first full day at work, and it was strange. On Monday I had to go in for a couple of hours–and I figured it would be a good way to transition back in. I didn’t really want to talk to anyone, and no one was there.
The drive in was hard, as was running the couple of errands I had to do. Being alone with my thoughts for the first time was difficult–I cried during the drive, and when I stopped into Michaels to pick up some supplies to consolidate the ultrasounds and pee sticks we have. The pile is still sitting on my desk because I’m not quite sure what to do with it. I don’t want to make more out of it, but feel I need to do something.
I’m starting to talk to people again, and at least I can do it without crying now. My eyes just well up. I think in some ways I must have it easier than Shawna–I can distract myself with work, and have people around me to talk to if I need to. I know she had a hard day yesterday being alone with Graem. In spite of keeping herself extremely busy, she’s just hanging out with a 2-year-old who can’t converse much beyond saying “My DO it!”
At least it’s a short week.
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