So I must first add the disclaimer that we’re not dirty people. Our house is pretty clean and every day we put away dishes, laundry, and have a clean floor before we go to bed.

Our cars are a different story. We eat in them, most of the winter they have slush on the mats, and we get the car washed once a month or so - if that.

Now….for the nasty part of the post. We have fucking mice.

That’s right, people. MICE.

I swear to the good lord above…if I see one of them I’m going to scream bloody murder.

We discovered our mouse problem before I went away to Houston. I had taken apart the dehumidifer in the basement to clean it when I found it full of a mouse nest and tons of mouse shit. Gross, right?

So I left it there and Margot cleaned it out.

We figure, what the hell…we have a cat who is suppose to be a mouser and all that crazy animal does is chase her tail around!

Yesterday we were driving around in my new mini-van and low and behold Margot opens the glove box to get a kleenex and sees torn up tissue. She asks why I put them back in there like that and I say I thought she did it. As she looks more she realizes MORE MOUSE SHIT.

Gross.

So after I get sick to my stomach I drop her off at work, Graem off at school, and head straight to the carwash to throwout EVERYTHING and clean up the turds.

I also called the Toyota dealership and they say that they’re getting lots of calls about mice and that they’ll hopefully move out when it warms out. They also said that they have heard of bags that you put under the hood that contain repellent - you can get them at Agway.

So this morning we’re driving Margot’s car and I ask her to check her glove box. Sure as shit…TURDS!

Those friggin’ mice have taken residence in our cars and they’re shitting all over the place!

I haven’t taken her car to get it cleaned out and figure I’ll do it tomorrow.

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, I run down to Agway and pick up the bags of repellent. Go figure…Ithaca….it’s some all natural spearmint stuff. I figure I’ll try that and if I still see mouse shit I’m going anthrax.

So I go to put the little bags in my van after cleaning it out yesterday. Wouldn’t you know it…MORE MOUSE SHIT!!

I think we have a problem here and now it seems like my life is turning into one of those bad Disney movies dealing with the crazy fat lady chasing a mouse.