So much has happened over the past 24 hours.
Yesterday Margot’s brother arrived at around 5pm. We all packed into the minivan and went for our favorite - Indian food.
Afterwards we came home, washed the kids, put them to bed and the adults hung out and played Wii Rockband. We had an excellent time. By 10pm we were all exhausted and scattered to our respective sleep areas. I slept on the couch because Emmy was in the playpen and I didn’t want to leave her by herself, Dennis went to the spare bedroom, and Margot went upstairs to sleep with Graem in our bed.
At 1:30am I heard Dennis upstairs talking on the phone and when I got up they shared the news that their dad was found on the bathroom floor unresponsive.
Margot’s dad’s girlfriend called EMT and they said “it doesn’t look good” and that Manny was only having 6 respirations per minute. They asked for a DNR (Do no resisitate) order. Of course, noone knows if there is one.
After about an hour we call the hospital to get an update and basically find out that Margot’s dad has been intubated and is in critical condition. No other news is available.
So of course, we’re all just sitting in the bed upstairs surrounded by sleeping children and crying. Margot’s dad has had stage 4 colon cancer for around 2 years now. He’s had surgery to remove the cancer, survived it, and is now undergoing chemo after having it reoccur.
I’m saddest for Margot and Dennis because they’re in their early thirties and that just seems way too young to lose both of your parents. It makes me sad that Grammy and Emmy are so young. However, I’m glad that they at least were able to meet him.
It also makes me sad that after all of the tough years that Manny has gone through with drug addiction and depression and dealing with Margot’s mother — he finally was leading a somewhat healthy life and then was hit with cancer.
Margot and Dennis left this morning to head to New York City. We decided that it’d be best if I stayed home with the kids because they really don’t need to be in a hospital and because Margot and Dennis need to make some serious decisions and it’s going to be stressful enough without a crazy almost-4-year-old and a naughty baby.
When Margot and Den got to the hospital they found their father blue and he looked absolutely horrible. He was hooked up to machines and I don’t think they expected to see him look like that.
They have had various doctors come in and they all concur that the situation is grim. However, they are giving Manny antibiotics, blood transfusions, and keeping him intubated for the time being. At this point they’re buying time for family to make it from out of town.
In the same token, his body could completely fail and there’s not machine that could keep him alive. To some extent…that might be the best case scenario because not one person would have to make the decision to “pull the plug.”
I hope and pray that both Margot and Dennis find peace. I can’t imagine losing a parent and know it’s one of the hardest situations they will ever have to face. I’m sad that they’ve had to do it twice.
We’ve told Graem that Grandpa’s sick and she understands. We also explained to her that grandpa is dying and we think she understands that too. One thing that we’re going to try and be aware of is having conversations in front of her. For a few minutes today she had to confirm that it was Grandpa that was dying and not mommy.
Then she said with tears in her eyes “I miss grandpa and mommy.”
We miss grandpa too.
